Going Inside - A note on how Internal Family Systems differs from traditional talk therapy
When we think about going to counselling, we typically assume we’ll be sitting across from a therapist and talking. Our focus will be outward, directed toward the therapist. We will also be aware of our body and mind, but our attention is divided. We might wonder what the therapist is thinking, we might be distracted by the space we’re in, and we could be self-conscious. That said, it is the dialogue between the therapist and the client that facilitates the desired outcome of therapy. Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy differs in that the focus is inward and an inner dialogue takes place in the mind of the client. This may sound strange at first, but it becomes natural and intuitive surprisingly quickly. More on this below.
In IFS therapy, the therapist guides the client to focus inward and the client will often close their eyes. The therapist then asks the client to focus on a part of themselves that they’d like to learn about or help, for example their inner critic. The therapist then asks the client to observe their body for any sensations, and to note any thoughts, feelings, or images that come to mind.
Often, clients experience a sensation in their body. The therapist then asks if the client is able to focus on that sensation. Once the client has done this, the therapist begins to guide the client to “get to know” this part of them. In IFS, there is a procedure the therapist follows to guide this process.
This getting to know is facilitated by the therapist offering questions to the client to ask the part of themselves they are focused on (in this case the inner-critic). The amazing thing is, the client will get answers and so begins an internal dialogue. From there, the work begins; the client has the opportunity to gain a deep understanding of the beliefs, experiences, thoughts, feelings, behaviours, and fears of this part of them. What countless IFS sessions have shown is that these parts have a story to tell. They have a role to play and a job to do. The role they play and the job they do makes total sense to them. They are committed.
What clients can learn is that these parts, particularly an inner-critic, may be tired. It may not want to do this job, it might even want the opportunity to transform to a more helpful job. Through getting to know this part and offering it compassion for how hard it works, we can give it the opportunity to change. Our inner-critic can let go of its beliefs and strategies, it can transform into an inner-chearleader, a coach, or a helpful encourager. This process can be transformational, firmly changing our understanding of ourselves and our inner experience.
-Robbie
